Day 16
Maybe, soon, I can finally stop blogging every flipping day and stop counting days.......hmmm....nah, probably not for awhile yet. I really need this. It's good for me.
Does anyone else peruse blogs for the exact AF day you are on and then read from that point forward? Maybe I'm just weird. I find myself looking through blogs of folks who have been AF for a long time and then trying to pinpoint exactly when they were on the same day I am on and I don't read further than that.
I'm very much what I call a time-reference person. When I get home from a vacation I'm always thinking "this time last week I was lying on the beach". Or this time last year I was doing such and such. Or 4 years ago in February after that thing happened, what was I doing? It drives my family crazy that I can spend hours obsessing with my grandmother about this type of thing...we can waste inordinate amounts of our lives by sitting and chatting about exactly what we ate at that particular restaurant years ago and trying to decide if that was before or after such and such. At least I can say it runs in the family.
So, yesterday and the day before, I was reading Day 14 and 15 of SoberMummy's blog as an example. I won't let myself read any further forward than the day I am on except for all of her recent posts since I went AF. My goal is that I am AF long enough to catch up! It's like watching a recording of a show that is on but started an hour ago and you finally catch up to the current live version after skipping commercials.
SM has a tab on her site for Days 30 to 100. I haven't read it yet! I can't! It will be my reward for when I finally get to Day 30. I've only read the Advice for Newbies tab. At 30 days I'll get to open it up and read it. How crazy is this, hmm?? Probably explains why I just adore those window-opening Advent calendars at Christmas time...I never cheated and looked ahead on those either.
So to anyone who wonders if they should keep their old posts, please do! You never know who will be wading through your blogs, wanting to know what you were like at that exact point in time of your life! Crazy people like me just might be doing so!
HD
I do the exact same thing! Trying to figure out where others were when they were at the same stage as me.....it's encouraging to see them get so far and comforting to know that they were exactly where we are at one point in their journey.....I want to be at dat 15, day 30, etc...and looking forward to that so desperately! Congratulations on your Day 16....I will be behind you and supporting you :)
ReplyDeleteHa, it's nice to know I'm not alone! I'm supporting you too! I made a comment that I feel like I'm drafting off Ripleybelle like two big rig trucks on a highway with one in front of the other. You can draft off me too! We'll get there!
DeleteWhen I first started reading sober blogs, I did go back to their beginning days to see what they felt or did.
ReplyDeleteIt really helped!
Happy Day 16!
xo
Wendy
Thanks, Wendy! Made it through tonight past wine o'clock. Another day tomorrow!
DeleteHappy Sweet 16! I totally get what you're saying, it's like what were others thinking, struggling with, finding easy/challenging. It signals that if they're ahead in the calendar count we too can get there!
ReplyDeleteThat's right, Cricket! We can!
DeleteI can go to my own (handwritten) journals to see what I was doing on a certain date, and most of the time I was on Day so and so. It does give one the feeling of groundhog's day -- the same thing happening over and over again. Congratulations on Day 16!
ReplyDeleteHopefully I stop counting sometime. I think my goal is to get to 30 and then taper off on the postings. Just so maybe I don't stay so preoccupied with it all. Or maybe not. We'll see.
DeleteYep can totally relate to this HD. I have had a rough trot of late but back for (another) day 1...xo
ReplyDeleteYep can totally relate to this HD. I have had a rough trot of late but back for (another) day 1...xo
ReplyDeleteJB, I love that your comments duplicate too... mine seem to all over the place! I have no idea why either. Sorry you've had a setback but, as we've all read, the time will be right at some point. Count your total days AF against the blips and try to stay motivated!!
DeleteThanks HD that means a lot. After a tearful appointment at the dr this morning she suggested I go to an AA meeting and without thinking I just did it. People were nice and I got a number. Fairly emotional right now but feel I may have just found a way forward. Go you on day 16 HD!!!!! xoxo
DeleteOh yay!!! That must have been hard and you must have felt like you were hit by a train yesterday. I hope you felt better today. Good for you for going. I'm thinking about you and channeling virtual hugs your way!
DeleteI too time reference like you do. So much so that I sometimes think I live too much in the past or waste the present for longing for days gone by. I think I have a few day 16's!! Not sure if they are all recorded in my blog though. I would never delete my old post's, at least I can't imagine doing it now. Who knows in the future! Congrats on day 16! A x
ReplyDeleteMe too. I have to constantly revisit past issues sometimes to the point that I wish I could just let them go in my head. I find that, with me anyways, that just takes time and maybe longer than for some.
DeleteThat is so funny because today I went to posts for 3 months on blogs!!! I looked for 90 days! I went to SM's blog as well! But I do that whole "oh last week we were on a beach" thing too. I like counting days. It empowers me.
ReplyDeleteHa, love it! I like the idea that it empowers me. Good one!
DeleteI so do this too! I remember reading Secret Mummy's early days blog too. And now I'm going to read up on 30-100! Don't stop counting days if it feels good to you. I was going to stop after day 13 but I'm numerical and like to count up.
ReplyDeleteAnd hey - aren't you now past your personal best??!!
ReplyDeleteYes, yes I am :-) Thank you :-) Don't tell me what you read...I'll be there in T minus 14 days...but who's counting....
DeleteI used to go through blogs to see at what point people lost weight! Lots of blogs don't mention much about weight and fair enough, but I always looked for it as something to look forward to I reached that point :)
ReplyDeleteHmmm...that's a good idea! I've lost two pounds, that's all. (I know 1 lb a week is supposed to be meaningful but I wish it would come off faster.) I think the extra working out I'm doing is just processing all the extra chocolate I'm eating so I'm going with the 2 lbs is from quitting wine!
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