Rest Time!!!

Rest time is not waste time.  It is economy to gather fresh strength....It is wisdom to take occasional furlough.  In the long run, we shall do more by sometimes doing less             Charles Spurgeon

I'm trying and failing to rest.

When I was on vacation at my family gathering 2 weeks past, I got AMAZING SLEEP! No husband snoring, no dog needing to pee in the middle of the night, no me having to pee in the middle of the night because I woke up, no anxiety dreams to remember because I woke up, etc.

Fast forward to the past 4 nights......4th and 3rd night ago we had thunder and lightening.  One would think that owning a HUNTING dog... that the jackass would be fine with thunder.  You can shoot a shotgun near him and he has no issue, but thunder?  Forget it.  So we had two nights that started out with dog going under the bed, back out from under the bed, back under the bed....get the picture?  This wasn't even with a 5 minute rest in between.....this was under/out/under/out.  

Dog is too big to go under our bed so in addition to scraping himself as he was doing it, when he was under the bed it vibrated as if I was sitting on top of my clothes dryer.  That would have been more pleasurable!

So for two nights we would try to calm him down and then husband, who can sleep through a freight train going by, would take him into the living room and sleep on the couch. He probably ignored the dog but I didn't suffer through dog's angst anymore.  I think dog has lost 5 pounds due to uncontrollable shivering.

I'm all about trying a "thunder" jacket on the dog but husband isn't too keen.  Male pride thing methinks.

Then, the last two nights we have had the practice fireworks.  This is what happens with the 4th of July here in America is on a Monday.  The fireworks go off all weekend.  If I thought dog hated thunder, he REALLY hates fireworks.  

I tried to get him to go out to pee and as I was dragging him to the pee garden you would think we were under fire by the enemy.  His tail was so far under his legs I was afraid he would poke himself in the eye from his belly side.  Gave up on trying to get him to pee.

Last night we brought in the travel crate for airplanes.  It's smaller and I figured it would be a nice den for him.  Put it next to my side of the bed with a little space for me to walk next to it to get into bed.  Dog ignored crate and tried to fit into that little space.  I finally shooed him out and pulled crate next to bed.  Then dog went into crate, out of crate, into crate, out of crate until BAM I locked him in.  Now crate was vibrating so I shoved it away from bed.  

At least he wasn't fussing and I think finally did fall asleep.   We let him out about 2am but it took major coaxing to convince him the sky wasn't falling anymore.  

So I'm a little tired today.  This day is full of a lot of firsts.  This is the first 4th of July with no kids as they are with exes this holiday.  Normally we have some kids around.  This is my first 4th of July with no alcohol. This is my first 4th of July where I said I was going to "take it easy" and not go to, nor plan a shindig.  

I did all the laundry, dishes, paid bills, etc yesterday.  I have scheduled nothing for today.....and I can't UNWIND.  So here I sit dumping on you and blogging about it.  Maybe you will feel sorry for my lack of sleep and overall grumpiness.

Okay, so I really am going to try and go lay by the pool, read magazines, listen to my audio book and be in the present!!!  I won't spend time missing the children, nor feeling like I'm missing out by not going to nor hosting a BBQ.  I wanted it this way, we planned it this way!

Last night husband had too much wine.  Fortunately for him he is a cute drunk but I felt like one of those ladies in the Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disneyland (for those who understand this) being chased by amorous pirates.  I'm exhausted in many ways.  The fact that I can't drink just plain annoys me more than anything.  I don't crave the wine, I crave the desire to tune out and have fun!!

Alright, seriously, I will truly try to relax the rest of the day.  I have gotten this all off my chest. Tonight, with the true fireworks, it will be hell.....but then hopefully restful nights are forthcoming!!

Happy 4th to all celebrating!

HD