Day 2 ...evening
I think reality hasn't really set in yet. When I quit drinking in March I started by being out of town. This time husband is out of town and gets back tomorrow night. I'm busy with evening sports and I look forward to a good book later. Definitely easier to not drink and not want to drink when normal triggers not in place. No desire for wine as yet but I think Day 4 will be more of a challenge when the wine o'clock-after-work habit will want to rear it's head.
Slept pretty well last night, might be more a function of no snoring next to me than lack of alcohol!!! Worked out early this morning (practically unheard of before now) and now fully drinking tea with Stevia instead of Splenda. I don't know if true but I heard that you don't get sugar cravings with Stevia like you do with Splenda. I have always felt that white wine is my evening sugar dose so maybe this will help with cravings. Hey, I'll take my accomplishments where I can! I admit to ingesting a bit of chocolate...weighed myself so I have a starting point.
I read somewhere in one of the blogs to not let yourself get too thirsty, too hungry, too tired or too stressed. Good advice! On toward Day 3....
Hey DWMWH you are doing so great! After many ups and downs and a totally toxic relationship with wine (and hence myself) I am here on day 1. Had breaks before but find each time I tell myself it's ok to restart my consumption increases. Right now I'm knocking back around 1.5 - 2 bottles of wine in a night - more if I start earlier at lunch or in the arvo. It's insane and it has become my crutch to deal with awful thoughts and feelings and also depression and anxiety. This time I'm back on a small dose of antabuse (only a quarter tab)- enough to cause unpleasant tiredness, flushing and sleepiness if I drink on it. We had house guests last week that are heavy drinkers (though not as heavy as me I noticed) and I was so pissy I gave myself a black eye in the bathroom before coming to bed. This is the second black eye I've incurred related to alcohol. I need to realise it is just not an option anymore though I'm sitting here feeling scared, lonely, weak, tired and sick of it all. Keep up the awesome work and I'll be here cheering from the sidelines! JB xo
ReplyDeleteAwww, JB, you gave me another reason why to not drink.....Tired of getting embarrassing bruises! Most of mine happened when I fell in my closet before bed and landed on a shoe or fell out of bed and clobbered myself on the end table...almost forgot about those gems. I'm looking at the sunset and got my first craving in two days. Hmmm..pretty sunsets = trigger. Okay, good to identify. I'll be cheering for you too! It's going to be a rough road I think but we'll be better for it!
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ReplyDeleteShambling on through to day 2. I went out for a walk last night (new sober thing yay) and stared at the sunset and tried to feel positive about the journey ahead. Just commented here on Idle Hands blog - another newbie like us! Check out http://idlinghands.blogspot.com.au/
ReplyDeleteI think chocolate or whatever gets you through the first few weeks is fine. I'm struggling a little at the moment as have a fairly heavy work and study load till around the end of May and a few challenges ahead but trying to turn my head around to the fact that life without wine will be infinitely better and I'm now at the fork in the road so to speak. I have a lot of friends who are heavy drinkers but have an understanding husband and 2 kids to think about which logically outweighs socialising drunk every time - I just need to get that through my head!The messages to drink are all around us, I guess it will just take time. When I was a far more moderate drinker I used to work i the wine industry and thought it was so wonderful back when I wasn't fully under the spell of the wine witch/wolfie. So many people just don't get it but it's great to communicate with people like you who absolutely do. Keep blogging it might get rocky but I think it's the only way we can really find some inner peace and feel truly fulfilled. It's so much more than just ditching the booze isn't it? JB xo