Friday, March 29, 2019

Gravitating back....

I decided to check blogs again for the first time in a few months and, voila, found others in my same boat.  Good.  It's helpful to see people posting again who are still works in progress like myself.

I took the pressure off over the last few months, just trying to get my direction and bearing figured out for the new year.  Had a great vacation but realized if I don't get this body in line, soon, it's going to get out of control.

I still.....

1) Drink too much in the evenings, too many times a week, to be considered healthy
2) Rarely ever gray-out or brown-out, or whatever they call it, anymore - probably because I have gained weight...
3) Never pass out
4) Feel better than I have in years, emotionally and physically, other than associations with drinking
5) Never skip out on any obligation
6) Go to the gym 3 times a week and actually even attempt cardio sometimes
7) Have lost weight because I have been eating more mindfully....okay, a lot of lettuce wrapped burgers and hold the fries... but it has worked.
8) Do wake up a bit fuzzy headed some mornings and would like to go back to bed but never do.
9) Wake up in the morning determined to never drink again and get good sleep, and then I enjoy wine with the hubs all evening.

But, breakthrough.  Hubs also said he didn't think we should drink like this forever.  I'm scared to write this but, together, we are doing Annie Grace's 30 day alcohol experiment starting Sunday.  We are both going to read the book, do the days and NOT talk about it.  Just keep each other from buying wine.   I started reading it in January and then quit on it.  But it is a great book.

I'm scared to blog about this because I always cave and let myself down.  This is a good time though, as we have family visiting off and on over a month where we don't want to drink.  My family, which is my drinking trigger, doesn't come back through until May so I'm hopeful that with 30 days under my belt, I'll be ready to continue total abstinence.

I finally feel ready to clear out my system for a good, long time.

I know I can do this.  Here's to Sunday!  We picked a few days out because while we are done with wine, there might be beer in the forecast for him Saturday night.  This time I'm going to blog straight for 30 days just to hopefully hold myself accountable.  Time to get off this merry go 'round.